I am completely and totally in love with a guy who doesn't know I exist. The only reason I ever fell for him was because he was always there and I gave up on every other person I ever had feelings for. I even went to the same school as an old love just for one more year to change his mind, which I didn't do because I never had the nerve to talk to him and work things out.
I pretend to be an eternal optimist, when in reality I'm about as pessimistic as they come. I don't believe in love. I don't believe that friendships can truly last a lifetime, past all of the life choices that are bound to change you. I don't believe any one like me can ever be loved and I don't believe that men are ever truly capable of loving anyone in the first place.
I don't believe there is such a thing as a genuinely happy relationship. I don't believe that everything happens for a reason and that you'll be happy it happened one day. I don't believe that the terrible things that happen in this world can be overcome.
There is no reason for this post. There is no rhyme or reason to why I decided to share these thoughts with other people. I just feel like there is no way to explain why I think the way I do without explaining what it is I'm thinking in the first place.
